Benjamin Alire Saenz Famous Quotes & Sayings

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100 Benjamin Alire Saenz Famous Sayings, Quotes and Quotation.

Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: A heart so pure it was nothing but storm. A heart so pure it was nothing but storm.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Daughters. They were sometimes as familiar and intimate as honeysuckles in bloom, but mostly daughters Daughters. They were sometimes as familiar and intimate as honeysuckles in bloom, but mostly daughters were mysteries. They lived in rooms you had long since abandoned and could not, did not, ever want to reenter.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Maybe Sam was right about things hiding inside of us. How many more things were Maybe Sam was right about things hiding inside of us. How many more things were hiding there?
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Mom had told me about that - she called it a dangerous light. It's beautiful Mom had told me about that - she called it a dangerous light. It's beautiful to look at, but it blinds people, she said, that kind of light. It's not good to be out in it.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: That smell - cigarette - it always made me think of him. He smoked his That smell - cigarette - it always made me think of him. He smoked his cigarette. I drove. I didn't mind the silence and the desert and the cloudless sky. What did words matter to a desert?
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I ask her if she loves me and I always feel bad when I ask I ask her if she loves me and I always feel bad when I ask her that because it makes me sound so desperate. I ask and ask and ask.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Don't break my heart," she said. Almost soft, but the rage coming back into her Don't break my heart," she said. Almost soft, but the rage coming back into her voice when she said heart - like a wave that is about to crest and crash against the shore. "Don't break my fucking heart.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: So," I said, "the only way for me to arrive at angel status is to So," I said, "the only way for me to arrive at angel status is to appear in your screwed-up dreams."
"Take it any way you can get it, babe.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: The thing about artists is that they tell stories. I mean, some paintings are like The thing about artists is that they tell stories. I mean, some paintings are like novels.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: The sun flickers. Like a flame hit by a sudden gust of wind. Like the The sun flickers. Like a flame hit by a sudden gust of wind. Like the lights of a bomb shelter during an air raid. Even the sun flickers. That's what she kept telling herself. A gust, a bomb, a small explosion. Then the disruption passed - everything calm again. Everything returning to normalcy. Except that she felt herself trembling. Except she knew that this was the beginning. It was her body that had flickered.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Because when you do something, you have to know exactly what you're doing." "No one Because when you do something, you have to know exactly what you're doing." "No one knows exactly what they're doing," I said. "That's because people are lazy and undisciplined.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Sometimes parents loved their sons so much that they made a romance out of their Sometimes parents loved their sons so much that they made a romance out of their lives. They thought our youth could help us overcome everything. Maybe moms and dads forgot about this one small fact: being on the verge of seventeen could be harsh and painful and confusing. Being on the verge of seventeen could really suck.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Like an animal. As if people weren't animals. She tried to put a face on Like an animal. As if people weren't animals. She tried to put a face on him. His eyes would betray the chaos of his heart, the riots that were exploding everywhere inside him. His eyes would be so black that they would shine blue in the sun.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: And even me who did know them. I - I hated being loved by them. And even me who did know them. I - I hated being loved by them. But I couldn't run. I couldn't. It is useless to run from a storm. So I stayed. I know about storms as well as anyone.
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: About stuff. Stupid stuff. And then he asked me, "Why do Mexicans like nicknames?" "I About stuff. Stupid stuff. And then he asked me, "Why do Mexicans like nicknames?" "I don't know. Do we?
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Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Do you think, Ari, that love has anything to do with the secrets of the Do you think, Ari, that love has anything to do with the secrets of the universe?" "I don't know. Maybe.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Do you know what gardenias smell like?" "Yes." "That's what it's like to be glad. Do you know what gardenias smell like?"
"Yes."
"That's what it's like to be glad. You wake searching for the smell of gardenias. Or the smell of oranges. Or the smell of agaves. Or the smell of rosemary. And you think, God, I can smell. And you walk out and you see the light falling on everything - on the delicate leaves of a mesquite or the brilliant white of an oleander in bloom that almost blinds you or the bougainvillea that explodes pink like a firecracker. And you think, God, I can see.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: They broke more than his ribs. They broke more than his ribs.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Like a girl, but a girl who had always been a woman. Like a girl, but a girl who had always been a woman.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: And every time I did spectacularly well in my classes, and I'm here to tell And every time I did spectacularly well in my classes, and I'm here to tell you that I did spectacularly well, I could always see the look of surprise on my professors' faces. You don't think I noticed? What you saw on Dave's face, I saw every damned day of my academic career. So what, Andres? I wanted to do something, to be something - and I did it. I don't think I deserve a medal, and I don't think I'm particularly special. I wanted to do something, and I figured out a way to do it.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: There are worse things in the world than a boy who likes to kiss other There are worse things in the world than a boy who likes to kiss other boys.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Moms and God generally get along pretty well. Moms and God generally get along pretty well.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I never knew what to say.""Really? You seem comfortable enough with words.""I have a formal I never knew what to say."
"Really? You seem comfortable enough with words."
"I have a formal and aesthetic relationship to words.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I could have asked my father lots of questions. I could have. But there was I could have asked my father lots of questions. I could have. But there was something in his face and eyes and in his crooked smile that prevented me from asking. I guess I didn't believe he wanted me to know who he was. So I just collected clues. Watching my father read that book was another clue in my collection. Some day all the clues would come together. And I would solve the mystery of my father.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I love swimming""I know," I said."I love swimming," he said again. He was quiet for I love swimming"
"I know," I said.
"I love swimming," he said again. He was quiet for a little while. And then he said, "I love swimming - and you."
I didn't say anything.
"Swimming and you, Ari. Those are the things I love the most.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: And like everybody else in the known universe, she didn't always let herself in on And like everybody else in the known universe, she didn't always let herself in on the truth.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: See the thing about artists is that they tell stories. See the thing about artists is that they tell stories.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I had a feeling there was something wrong with me. I guess I was a I had a feeling there was something wrong with me. I guess I was a mystery even to myself.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: What did being connected to the world get you? It got you sadder. Look, the What did being connected to the world get you? It got you sadder. Look, the world is not sane. If you stay connected to an insane world, well, you just go crazy. This is not a complicated theory. It's just simple logic.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: If there's no heaven, I don't really care. Maybe people are heaven, Dad. Some people, If there's no heaven, I don't really care. Maybe people are heaven, Dad. Some people, anyway. You and Sam and Fito. Maybe you're all heaven. Maybe everyone's heaven, and we just don't know it.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: He was on fire, she could almost touch the rage. He could scare people. He He was on fire, she could almost touch the rage. He could scare people. He could make anyone afraid, if he wanted to.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Everyone was always becoming someone else. Everyone was always becoming someone else.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I watched her from the doorway. I wondered how it was that she came to I watched her from the doorway. I wondered how it was that she came to be the owner of that rage. I wanted it for myself but there was nothing in me.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Scars. A sign that you had been hurt. A sign that you had healed. Scars. A sign that you had been hurt. A sign that you had healed.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Senior year. And then life. Maybe that's the way it worked. High school was just Senior year. And then life. Maybe that's the way it worked. High school was just a prologue to the real novel. Everybody got to write you
but when you graduated, you got to write yourself. At graduation you got to collect your teacher's pens and your parents' pens and you got your own pen. And you could do all the writing. Yeah. Wouldn't that be sweet?
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: It was like letting go of the sky. It was like letting go of the sky.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: There is a famous painting, Nighthawks, by Edward Hopper. I am in love with that There is a famous painting, Nighthawks, by Edward Hopper. I am in love with that painting. Sometimes, I think everyone is like the people in that painting, everyone lost in their own private universes of pain or sorrow or guilt, everyone remote and unknowable. The painting reminds me of you. It breaks my heart.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: ...and I thought it was nice that they knew how to talk and how to ...and I thought it was nice that they knew how to talk and how to laugh and how to be in the world.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: And afterward, we played Frisbee with Legs in the park and we were all right. And afterward, we played Frisbee with Legs in the park and we were all right. And I needed us to be all right. And he needed us to be all right too. And so we were.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Maybe all that silence about my brother did something to me. I think it did. Maybe all that silence about my brother did something to me. I think it did. Not talking can make a guy pretty lonely
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Turning on the radio and just sitting there was my version of praying. Turning on the radio and just sitting there was my version of praying.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Don't you have hobbies?""Sure. Staring at the blank walls. Don't you have hobbies?"
"Sure. Staring at the blank walls.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I felt alone, but not in a bad way. I really liked being alone. Maybe I felt alone, but not in a bad way. I really liked being alone. Maybe I liked it too much. Maybe
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: His smile was breaking my heart. His smile was breaking my heart.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Sometimes he feels as though God is nothing more than a set of jaws that Sometimes he feels as though God is nothing more than a set of jaws that bites down on his heart.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Everyone was becoming someone else. Sometimes, when you were older, you became someone younger. And Everyone was becoming someone else. Sometimes, when you were older, you became someone younger. And me, I felt old.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Her laugh was as fragile as the leaves she had raked when I was five. Her laugh was as fragile as the leaves she had raked when I was five.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Dogs don't censor themselves. Maybe animals were smarter than people. The dog was so happy. Dogs don't censor themselves. Maybe animals were smarter than people. The dog was so happy. My mom and dad too. It felt good to know that they loved the dog, that they let themselves do that. And somehow it seemed that the dog helped us be a better family.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Mima. No despair. She was dying, and there was not one sign of despair in Mima. No despair. She was dying, and there was not one sign of despair in her dancing eyes.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Damn it to hell, Dad, I can't stand to live with all your silence. Damn it to hell, Dad, I can't stand to live with all your silence.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Who hurt you? When did it happen? How many times? Where? Tell me. Why do Who hurt you? When did it happen? How many times? Where? Tell me. Why do you hate yourself? Where do you keep the hurt?
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I was harder than Dante. I think I'd tried to hide that hardness from him I was harder than Dante. I think I'd tried to hide that hardness from him because I'd wanted him to like me. But now he knew. That I was hard. And maybe that was okay. Maybe he could like the fact that I was hard just as I liked the fact that he wasn't hard.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: A girl is like a tree? Yeah, and a guy is about as smart as A girl is like a tree? Yeah, and a guy is about as smart as a piece of dead wood infested with termites
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Tears. They're like seeds in a watermelon. Good for spitting out. Tears. They're like seeds in a watermelon. Good for spitting out.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: And then I just couldn't stand it anymore, and I took Fito's fists and I And then I just couldn't stand it anymore, and I took Fito's fists and I was stronger than he was, and I held his arms and kept him from hitting himself. And then I just pulled him in to me, and I held him and he cried and he cried and he cried. And I couldn't do anything about all the hurt, but I could hold him.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: The storm was fierce. But I wasn't afraid. I knew my father's love was fiercer The storm was fierce. But I wasn't afraid. I knew my father's love was fiercer than any storm.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: You know what the worst thing about adults is?""No.""They're not always adults. But that's what You know what the worst thing about adults is?"

"No."

"They're not always adults. But that's what I like about them.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: It makes me angry that you hate yourself for something that somebody else made you It makes me angry that you hate yourself for something that somebody else made you do. Don't let them take any more. Don't you do that Andres."
"None of this does any good, Grace. All these visits, all this talking, all this strolling down fucking memory lane. It doesn't help. And you know why it doesn't help? Because everything that's happened - it lives so deep inside me that the only way I can ever get rid of it is to die."
"That's not true, Andres."
"It is true. Happiness isn't in the cards for everyone, Grace.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I hated being volunteered. The problem with my life was that it was someone else's I hated being volunteered. The problem with my life was that it was someone else's idea.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Listen, the road to happiness is a long fucking road trip. You can't takeThe freeway. Listen, the road to happiness is a long fucking road trip. You can't take
The freeway. Back roads, buddy, that's all you got. Unpaved back roads
And bad weather. Storms, baby. Don't expect to get there fast.
And don't expect yourself or your car to arrive in mint condition.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Yeah," I said. Sometimes I was full of halfhearted yeahs. Yeah," I said. Sometimes I was full of halfhearted yeahs.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: It looked like it was going to rain. They always came this time of year, It looked like it was going to rain. They always came this time of year, the rains. I heard the distant thunder. As we were walking toward Dante's house, it began to rain. And then it began to pour. I looked at Dante. "I won't run if you don't."
"I won't run."
So we walked in the rain. I wanted to walk faster, but instead I slowed down. I looked at Dante. "Can you take it?"
He smiled.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: All the hovering angels were gone. He thought maybe there had been a funeral. Someone All the hovering angels were gone. He thought maybe there had been a funeral. Someone had died. Everything was black - the sky, the clothes he was wearing, his heart.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: My father decided he would read everything that I read. Maybe that was our way My father decided he would read everything that I read. Maybe that was our way of talking.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: The world did have too many words. The sound of the rain was all we The world did have too many words. The sound of the rain was all we needed.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I think you love him more than you can bear. I think you love him more than you can bear.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: See, the thing about that word, Sharkey, the F-word, is that sometimes I make that See, the thing about that word, Sharkey, the F-word, is that sometimes I make that word do too much work. I mean, I say that word as if it clearly articulates what I'm really feeling. And it doesn't. It's a shortcut.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Do you think we'll ever discover all the secrets of the universe? Do you think we'll ever discover all the secrets of the universe?
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I always thought of men as being hard - maybe because I was hard. But I always thought of men as being hard - maybe because I was hard. But there was a softness in Tom that betrayed his large masculine hands and his deep baritone voice. He knew something about love that I didn't. I don't know where he'd learned it, but it wasn't something you got from a book, not something you could learn in an online class, not something you could borrow. Maybe it was something you were born with. Some people knew how to love and some people didn't. Tom was the former. I was the latter. I didn't know which one of us had it worse
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: He'd run and run until his heart burst into flames. And he would become nothing He'd run and run until his heart burst into flames. And he would become nothing but ash. No body, no heart, no bone, no flesh - just carbon matter scattering in the wind.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Did the thought ever occur to you that I might care about you? People are Did the thought ever occur to you that I might care about you? People are allowed to care about each other."
"You don't know me well enough to care about me."
"Let me clue you in on something, Andres. Just because you hate yourself doesn't mean that I have to hate you.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I wanted to feel those words in my mouth as I spoke them aloud. Words I wanted to feel those words in my mouth as I spoke them aloud. Words could be like food - they felt like something in your mouth. They tasted like something. "My brother is in prison." Those words tasted bitter.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I kind of liked his voice. He sounded like he had a cold, you know, I kind of liked his voice. He sounded like he had a cold, you know, like he was about to lose his voice. "You talk funny," I said.
"Allergies," he said.
"What are you allergic to?"
"The air," he said.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: She was hard as stone. And I hated her. I think I still hate her. She was hard as stone. And I hated her. I think I still hate her. Though in between then and now, I loved her. I would have done anything for her. And I did. I did everything she asked.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: But he didn't know exactly where the worry was coming from. He just had a But he didn't know exactly where the worry was coming from. He just had a feeling. Like thunder in the sky. Only the thunder was in his stomach. There would be a storm.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I didn't know what to do with that piece of information. So I just kept I didn't know what to do with that piece of information. So I just kept it inside. That's what I did with everything. Kept it inside.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I'll always remember that look on your face. You saw me. You've always seen me. I'll always remember that look on your face. You saw me. You've always seen me. And I think that's all that anyone wants. That's why Fito loves coming over here. He's been invisible all his life. And all of a sudden he's visible. Seeing someone. Really seeing someone. That's love.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: There was so little difference between a fist that was trying to hold everything in There was so little difference between a fist that was trying to hold everything in and the fist that was ready to release all its frustration and rage.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Something happen inside me as I looked out into the vast universe. Through that telescope, Something happen inside me as I looked out into the vast universe. Through that telescope, the world was closer and larger than I'd ever imagined. And it was all so beautiful and overwhelming and- I don't know- it make me aware that there was something inside of me that mattered.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Water was something he loved, something he respected. He understood its beauty and its dangers. Water was something he loved, something he respected. He understood its beauty and its dangers. He talked about swimming as if it were a way of life.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I didn't feel like a man just then. I felt like a five-year-old boy who I didn't feel like a man just then. I felt like a five-year-old boy who didn't want to do anything except play in a pile of leaves. A five-year-old boy with a greedy heart who wanted his grandmother to live forever.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: We stood there for long time. Neither one of us said anything. I felt small We stood there for long time. Neither one of us said anything. I felt small and insignificant and inadequate. I hated feeling that way. I was going to stop feeling that way. I was going to stop.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Words exist only in theory. And then one ordinary day you run into a word Words exist only in theory. And then one ordinary day you run into a word that exists only in theory. And you meet it face to face. And then that word becomes someone you know. That word becomes someone you hate. And you take that word with you wherever you go. And you can't pretend it isn't there.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Maybe it's a terrible thing, to keep a war to yourself. But maybe that's the Maybe it's a terrible thing, to keep a war to yourself. But maybe that's the way it has to be.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I bet you could sometimes find all the mysteries of the universe in someone's hand. I bet you could sometimes find all the mysteries of the universe in someone's hand.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I knew what he was saying, and I wished to God he was someone else, I knew what he was saying, and I wished to God he was someone else, someone who didn't have to say things out loud.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I think of their anger as a wind. And that wind took them away. From I think of their anger as a wind. And that wind took them away. From me. And all the others like me. So
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I'm not into all this academic stuff. Too much analysis. What ever happened to reading I'm not into all this academic stuff. Too much analysis. What ever happened to reading a book because you liked it?
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I don't know what the exact shape of my life will take--and what the days I don't know what the exact shape of my life will take--and what the days to come will bring--except i know that i am happy and my heart is still. I know that I have fallen in love with the word surrender and know that I can no longer live in disappointment
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I loved the different rules of summer. I loved the different rules of summer.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: You belong everywhere you go. That's just how you are. You belong everywhere you go. That's just how you are.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I thought masturbating was embarassing. I didn't even know why. It just was. It was I thought masturbating was embarassing. I didn't even know why. It just was. It was like having sex with yourself. Having sex with yourself was really weird. Autoeroticism.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: She had all this love in her eyes, and I swear I could drown in She had all this love in her eyes, and I swear I could drown in that love.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I don't always have to understand the people I love. I don't always have to understand the people I love.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I'm fighting myself. I know I am. One minute I want to remember. The next I'm fighting myself. I know I am. One minute I want to remember. The next minute I want to live in the land of forgetting. One minute I want to feel. The next minute I never want to feel ever again.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: His sadness was unbearable to watch. Far worse than his rage. He looked so defeated His sadness was unbearable to watch. Far worse than his rage. He looked so defeated in that sorrow - like he was surrendering, like the battle was too much.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: Why do you like to cuss?" "Everybody likes to cuss." "I don't." "They don't call Why do you like to cuss?" "Everybody likes to cuss." "I don't." "They don't call you Mr. Excitement for nothing.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: I didn't understand how you could live in a mean world and not have any I didn't understand how you could live in a mean world and not have any of that meanness rub off on you. How could a guy live without meanness?
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: It wasn't always going to be morning, and darkness would come around again. The sun It wasn't always going to be morning, and darkness would come around again. The sun would rise, and then the sun would set. And there you were in the darkness again. If you didn't whistle, the quiet and the dark would swallow you up. The thing is, I didn't know how to whistle. I guessed I was going to have to learn.
Benjamin Alire Saenz Sayings: There was this thing, this chaos inside me. And it had a noise, a howling. There was this thing, this chaos inside me. And it had a noise, a howling. That's what it was. I was nothing more than a dog or a coyote or any other animal in pain. And even then I was trying to speak. But my words weren't any use in the face of the terrible wind that was escaping from my heart. I guess it was from my heart. It hurt so bad. Why did it hurt so bad?