Ellen DeGeneres Famous Quotes & Sayings

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100 Ellen DeGeneres Famous Sayings, Quotes and Quotation.

Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Just go up to somebody on the street and say 'You're it!' and then run Just go up to somebody on the street and say 'You're it!' and then run away.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: The definition of success changes. Success is to live your life with integrity and not The definition of success changes. Success is to live your life with integrity and not give in to peer pressure to be something you're not. Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else's path; unless you're in the woods and you're lost and you see a path, then by all means, you should follow that.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Start thinking positively. You will notice a difference. Instead of 'I think I'm a loser,' Start thinking positively. You will notice a difference. Instead of 'I think I'm a loser,' try 'I definitely am a loser.' Stop being wishy-washy about things! How much more of a loser can you be if you don't even know you are one? Either you are a loser or you are not. Which is it, stupid?
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: For a long time I thought I knew for sure who I was. I grew For a long time I thought I knew for sure who I was. I grew up in New Orleans and became a comedian. And there was everything that came along with that. The nightclubs. The smoking. The drinking. Then I turned 13.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: It must be around forty, when you're "over the hill." I don't even know what It must be around forty, when you're "over the hill." I don't even know what that means and why it's a bad thing. When I go hiking and I get over the hill, that means I'm past the hard part and there's a snack in my future. That's a good thing as far as I'm concerned.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: There aren't a lot of hobbies you can eat. Like, let's say you love to There aren't a lot of hobbies you can eat. Like, let's say you love to cook. That's a bad example. Let's say you love to travel, and everywhere you go, you try the food at the best local - My point is, I love gardening as a hobby. Right now in our garden, Portia and I are growing tomatoes, peppers, zucchini, beets, eggplant,
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: So excited for the Apple Watch. For centuries, we've checked the time by looking at So excited for the Apple Watch. For centuries, we've checked the time by looking at our phones. Having it on your wrist? Genius.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: If you want to get rid of stuff, you can always do a good spring-cleaning. If you want to get rid of stuff, you can always do a good spring-cleaning. Or you can do what I do. Move.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Did you ever feel like the whole world was going to a party and your Did you ever feel like the whole world was going to a party and your invitation got lost in the mail?
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Gratitude is looking on the brighter side of life, even if it means hurting your Gratitude is looking on the brighter side of life, even if it means hurting your eyes.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: We're told to go on living our lives as usual, because to do otherwise is We're told to go on living our lives as usual, because to do otherwise is to let the terrorists win, and really, what would upset the Taliban more than a gay woman wearing a suit in front of a room full of Jews?
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I'm sure men have their own ways of trying to demean one another, but women I'm sure men have their own ways of trying to demean one another, but women can be very gossipy and judgmental, and that doesn't help.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Raspberry Sorbet with Capers Raspberry Sorbet with Capers
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I know that every time I list something that I am, I am potentially alienating I know that every time I list something that I am, I am potentially alienating a whole group of people. Publicists and managers will encourage you not to say what political party you belong to, what you eat, what you don't eat, who you sleep with and all that stuff.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: lost all of those things and you had to live in a cave all lost all of those things and you had to live in a cave all
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe you don't remember me! I'm like, 'Oh Dad I'm sorry!
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I get paid very well for an amazing, amazing life. I'm blessed. I get paid very well for an amazing, amazing life. I'm blessed.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: That woman in the shampoo commercial - she's happy. She's ... she's too happy. That woman in the shampoo commercial - she's happy. She's ... she's too happy.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I think I let go of the need for approval, ... It certainly feels good I think I let go of the need for approval, ... It certainly feels good when you get it, but I used to be more desperate for it. Once I felt better inside about myself ... I could do everything based on how I want to do things.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I had no intention of becoming a comedian. I just wanted to make people happy. I had no intention of becoming a comedian. I just wanted to make people happy. I tried everything-I shucked oysters, I painted houses, I sold vacuum cleaners. But there was always a voice saying, You should be doing something different. And it was usually my boss and I was being fired.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, by Woody Allen, by Bob Newhart, by Carol Burnett, by Lucille Ball.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: The way I see it ... If you need both of your hands for whatever The way I see it ... If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you're doing, then your brain should probably be in on it too.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Sometimes I get so lost in the moment, I start running around my yard, flapping Sometimes I get so lost in the moment, I start running around my yard, flapping my arms like a seagull at the beach. A lot of times I'll even start to squawk. Usually right around the third or fourth squawk is when my neighbor starts screaming at me to pipe down. He's always like, "Quiet down, lady! And put on some pants!" And I'm always like, "YOU put on some pants, sir!" because in the heat of the moment I panic and I can't think of anything better to say. Of course, he's already wearing pants, so it doesn't pack quite the punch I want it to, but the bottom line is he's clearly not as connected to nature as I am.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: You have to have funny faces and words, you can't just have words. It is You have to have funny faces and words, you can't just have words. It is a powerful thing, and I think that's why it's hard for people to imagine that women can do that, be that powerful.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I think there's too much mult-tasking going on. I think people need to quiet down I think there's too much mult-tasking going on. I think people need to quiet down and focus and be still more.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Hosting the Emmys is a challenge for me. I guess it's the equivalent of someone Hosting the Emmys is a challenge for me. I guess it's the equivalent of someone who needs to climb a mountain or jump out of a plane. It's that kind of thing, where this could go terribly wrong. And I love the feeling of when it goes right.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I've been trying to find women writers for my staff for a while now and I've been trying to find women writers for my staff for a while now and I have three women on my staff and three guys so it's pretty equal. I don't know why that is. It's been the same thing for a while. It's hard for female comedians to stand out. That's weird. That's a shame.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I love Jesus but I drink alittle- Gladis Hardy from the Ellen Show I love Jesus but I drink alittle- Gladis Hardy from the Ellen Show
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: My dream guests are really not so much celebrities. They're people who are actually interesting My dream guests are really not so much celebrities. They're people who are actually interesting and they're doing something interesting with their lives or had an interesting experience in some way. I really enjoy talking to regular, everyday people.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I don't consider myself an interviewer as much as an entertainer. I don't consider myself an interviewer as much as an entertainer.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: In the 80's we had high, high, waisted pants, that if they came up any In the 80's we had high, high, waisted pants, that if they came up any higher they'd have to go up another size, if you know what I mean.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: You're gonna be ok, dum de dum dum dum, just dance. You're gonna be ok, dum de dum dum dum, just dance.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I'm a - I'm a, um, a godmother which is just, that's fun to be I'm a - I'm a, um, a godmother which is just, that's fun to be a godmother, she is so precious, she's the light of my life, she's two ... or five or something, and she's, uh ... I don't know, I've never seen her - the pictures are precious, she just seems so, y'know ... She lives clear across town, I don't have that kind of time, but, um ... Well, I send money and stuff, it's not like I don't have a connection.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship - it's actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen days.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: It's our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting. It's our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting. Are they fun when they happen? No. But they are what make us unique. And that's what I know for sure ... I think.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: The song 'If I Had a Hammer' is geared toward people who don't have a The song 'If I Had a Hammer' is geared toward people who don't have a hammer. Maybe before I had a hammer I thought I'd hammer in the morning and hammer in the evening. But once you get a hammer, you find you don't really hammer as much as you thought you would.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: There's lotion for your face, lotion for your hands, lotion for your feet, lotion for There's lotion for your face, lotion for your hands, lotion for your feet, lotion for your body. Why? What would happen if you put hand lotion on your feet? Would your feet get confused and start clapping?
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: The only thing I really recommend, if you're starting out in stand-up is to not The only thing I really recommend, if you're starting out in stand-up is to not try to copy anybody else. You can be influenced by people. I was influenced by Steve Martin and Bob Newhart and Woody Allen, but I never tried to be someone else. I always tried to be myself. And the reason people are successful is they're unique.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I prefer to believe that people are good and honest and respect me enough to I prefer to believe that people are good and honest and respect me enough to tell me the truth. It's not easy to find those people all the time, but they're out there.
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Algebra in three years, he takes calculus now. He gets upset that you don't know Algebra in three years, he takes calculus now. He gets upset that you don't know anything about him, yells something about his "real dad," and storms out of the house. But he never tells you where his calculus books are, so you're back to square one, only worse off because of the glass in your foot and the sadness in your heart. So what I've done for you is included
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Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: All the commercials on TV today are for antidepressants, for Prozac or Paxil. And they All the commercials on TV today are for antidepressants, for Prozac or Paxil. And they get you right away. "Are you sad? Do you get stressed, do you have anxiety?" "Yes, I have all those things! I'm alive!"
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I collect old portraits. They're all just interesting pictures of people, and you just kind I collect old portraits. They're all just interesting pictures of people, and you just kind of wonder who they were and what they were. There's a guy - I don't know who he is, but he's wearing a suit. He's got his arms folded, and he looks like he sold insurance or something. I'm just wondering why someone painted him.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Have you ever thought about toothpaste? Ellen has! And she makes a point about all Have you ever thought about toothpaste? Ellen has! And she makes a point about all of the types of toothpaste that Colgate offers!
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Enjoy your life. God gave us our bodies as a gift. (Granted, to some of Enjoy your life. God gave us our bodies as a gift. (Granted, to some of us it's kind of a gag gift, but that's okay too.) Wear what you want, love who you want, and have fun.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: You never know what funny can do. You never know what funny can do.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Beauty is not between a size Beauty is not between a size 0 and a size 8. It's not a number at all.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Trying to get the talk show, looking back on it, we had to beg a Trying to get the talk show, looking back on it, we had to beg a lot of station managers to pick up the show because people thought no one would watch it because I'm openly gay.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Have you ever heard somebody sing some lyrics that you've never sung before, and you Have you ever heard somebody sing some lyrics that you've never sung before, and you realize you've never sung the right words in that song? You hear them and all of a sudden you say to yourself, 'Life in the Fast Lane?' That's what they're saying right there? You think, 'why have I been singing 'wipe in the vaseline?' how many people have heard me sing 'wipe in the vaseline?' I am an idiot.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I have an amazing team; I have amazing producers; I have amazing writers, but at I have an amazing team; I have amazing producers; I have amazing writers, but at the end of it, it's me making the decisions on the writing, the tone, the editing.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: When I decided to have my character on the show come out, I knew I When I decided to have my character on the show come out, I knew I was going to have to come out, too. I never wanted to be the lesbian actress. I never wanted to be the spokesperson for the gay community. Ever. I did it for my own truth.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: What did the letter O say to Q? Dude, your dikk is hanging out. What did the letter O say to Q? Dude, your dikk is hanging out.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I get home at the end of the day and I don't want to talk. I get home at the end of the day and I don't want to talk. All I want to do is lay on the floor and pet my dogs and my cats.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Why can't rappers just say nice things? Like I wanna take your clothes off and Why can't rappers just say nice things? Like I wanna take your clothes off and hang them up in the closet real nice.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I've got a lot to say about television. There's a lot going on in television I've got a lot to say about television. There's a lot going on in television right now and I feel like a huge part of television.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I do it because I love animals and I saw the reality. And I just I do it because I love animals and I saw the reality. And I just couldn't ignore it anymore. I'm healthier for it, I'm happier for it. I can't imagine that if you're putting something in your body that is filled with fear or anxiety or pain, that that isn't somehow going to be inside of you.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Baloney is just salami with an inferiority complex. Baloney is just salami with an inferiority complex.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: If success is really dependent on someone liking you or not liking you, and you If success is really dependent on someone liking you or not liking you, and you have to teeter on that kind of tightrope of how you're supposed to act and how you're supposed to look and who you are, it's just not a healthy way to live.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I think furniture is art. I don't think art is just for your walls - I think furniture is art. I don't think art is just for your walls - I think everything that someone has made is a piece of art.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I like sitting at outdoor restaurants; it would be nice to go someplace on the I like sitting at outdoor restaurants; it would be nice to go someplace on the street and not worry about somebody taking my picture while I'm about to take a bite of something.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: When life gives you lemons ... they could really be oranges. When life gives you lemons ... they could really be oranges.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I don't really ever live my life in fear. I really live my life in I don't really ever live my life in fear. I really live my life in gratitude and feeling positive for the most part.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Do we have to know who's gay and who's straight? Can't we just love everybody Do we have to know who's gay and who's straight? Can't we just love everybody and judge them by the car they drive?
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Procrastination isn't the problem. It's the solution. It's the universe's way of saying stop, slow Procrastination isn't the problem. It's the solution. It's the universe's way of saying stop, slow down, you move too fast.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: If someone says you're weird, say thank you. If someone says you're weird, say thank you.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: It's even more awkward when we're face to face with people. It used to be It's even more awkward when we're face to face with people. It used to be exciting to make plans with friends because you could sit and catch up and talk about what's been going on in your lives. Now when you see someone there's nothing left to say. You've already seen the pictures from their trip to Rio on Facebook. You've read their tweets about the latest diet they're on. And they already texted you about the pregnancy scare. So you end up just sitting and staring at each other until you both start texting other people.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: We're all different people and we're allowed to be different from one another. If someone We're all different people and we're allowed to be different from one another. If someone ever says you're weird, say thank you. And then curtsy. No, don't curtsy. That might be too weird. Bow. And tip your imaginary hat. That'll show them.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Leaning forward in your chair when someone is trying to squeeze behind you isn't enough. Leaning forward in your chair when someone is trying to squeeze behind you isn't enough. You also have to move the chair.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises. I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Why must women wake up and paint their faces? Who came up with this idea? Why must women wake up and paint their faces? Who came up with this idea? What's wrong with washing and moisturizing? So, if you care to wear make-up, go right ahead. No one's stopping you. I only suggest reconsidering. Is it totally necessary?
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. If I'm going to I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to achieve that state the old-fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that's ever happened to me has I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that's ever happened to me has taught me compassion.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: If you want to add a little spice to your life, plant some dill. And If you want to add a little spice to your life, plant some dill. And learn to salsa.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I think people talk too much anyway. Sometimes people are talking to me and in I think people talk too much anyway. Sometimes people are talking to me and in my mind I'm just like shut up, shut up, shut upblah blah blah blah blaaaaah.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Who needs sleep? I laugh in the face of sleep! Who needs sleep? I laugh in the face of sleep!
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: It's hard to understand failure when you're going through it, but in the grand scheme It's hard to understand failure when you're going through it, but in the grand scheme of things it's good to fall down - not because you're drunk and not near stairs.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I love clothes, so when I wear clothes, they're usually somebody's. You know, I'm not I love clothes, so when I wear clothes, they're usually somebody's. You know, I'm not wearing Kmart.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The Life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy by yourself and for yourself. Happiness comes from within. You have the power to change your own mindset so that all the negative, horrible thoughts that try to invade your psyche are replaced with happy, positive, wonderful thoughts.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: There are people out there hiding all kinds of things. People who have all this There are people out there hiding all kinds of things. People who have all this success and all this fame and all this money, and yet there are secrets that they think if we found out about, it would be over for them. And it's a horrible way to live whether you're famous or not.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Then you panic because you've never known the difference between a sweet potato and a Then you panic because you've never known the difference between a sweet potato and a yam and both are on the counter, and if you start making a yam pie you'll never hear the end of it.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I like being busy and juggling a lot of things at the same time. I I like being busy and juggling a lot of things at the same time. I get bored easily, so I need to do a lot.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. It must stand for: 'Ohhh my God, you're thin.'
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I admire people who know they can't sing. There are so many people out there I admire people who know they can't sing. There are so many people out there who can't sing, but they think they can, so they sing a lot.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: At a four-way stop sign, the person with the prettiest eyes has the right of At a four-way stop sign, the person with the prettiest eyes has the right of way
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Now,I'm no scientist,but I know what endorphins are. They're tiny little magical elves that swim Now,I'm no scientist,but I know what endorphins are. They're tiny little magical elves that swim through your blood stream and tell funny jokes to each other. When they reach your brain,you hear what they're saying and that boosts your health and happiness. "Knock Knock ... Who's There?.. Little endorphin ... Little endorphin who? ... Little Endorphin Annie." And then the endorphins laugh and then you laugh. See? Its Science.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Honestly, I would eat cardboard rather than go back to eating animals. Honestly, I would eat cardboard rather than go back to eating animals.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: We use only 10% of our brains ... Imagine how smart we would be if We use only 10% of our brains ... Imagine how smart we would be if we used the other 60%!
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I cannot believe they haven't yet come up with a better screening process than the I cannot believe they haven't yet come up with a better screening process than the mammogram. If a man had to put his special parts inside a clamp to test him for anything, I think they would come up with a new plan before the doctor finished saying, Put that thing there so I can crush it.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: When your heart is broken, when your heart has cracks in it, it lets the When your heart is broken, when your heart has cracks in it, it lets the light in.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Be kind to one another . Be kind to one another .
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the attention. It was - it really is, I have a career despite myself.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I'm a lesbian, an Aquarian, and a vegetarian. I'm a lesbian, an Aquarian, and a vegetarian.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I have a terrible problem with procrastination ... a friend told me, "Well, you should I have a terrible problem with procrastination ... a friend told me, "Well, you should go to therapy." And I thought about it, but then I said, "Wait a minute. Why should I pay a stranger to listen to me talk when I can get strangers to pay to listen to me talk?" And that's when I got the idea of touring.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log. Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: There is something about TM. It is the only time I have that stillness ... There is something about TM. It is the only time
I have that stillness ... It gives me this peaceful
feeling-I just love it so much.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: Do you live each day as if it's your first or your last? Either way Do you live each day as if it's your first or your last? Either way you should probably have a diaper on.
Ellen DeGeneres Sayings: I think there's a whole bunch of things that go along with being a girl. I think there's a whole bunch of things that go along with being a girl. You're not supposed to have opinions or be tough or strong. You're supposed to be soft and vulnerable, and I find those qualities important in both men and women.