Jay London Famous Quotes & Sayings

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36 Jay London Famous Sayings, Quotes and Quotation.

Jay London Sayings: My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality. My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality.
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Jay London Sayings: I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road. I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road.
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Jay London Sayings: Do you know it was a year a ago today? Do you know it was a year a ago today?
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Jay London Sayings: A window of opportunity for me usually involves a rock. A window of opportunity for me usually involves a rock.
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Jay London Sayings: I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger.
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Jay London Sayings: I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be', I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be', they told me it wasn't enough.
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Jay London Sayings: I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness. I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.
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Jay London Sayings: I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights. I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.
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Jay London Sayings: They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I'm more concerned about the They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I'm more concerned about the adults.
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Jay London Sayings: You know what burns me? Matches. You know what burns me? Matches.
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Jay London Sayings: I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time. I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time.
Jay London Sayings: My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese. My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese.
Jay London Sayings: His puppyhood was a period of foolish rebellion. He was always worsted, but he fought His puppyhood was a period of foolish rebellion. He was always worsted, but he fought back because it was his nature to fight back. And he was unconquerable.
Jay London Sayings: You might recognize me, I'm the fourth guy from the left on the evolutionary chart, You might recognize me, I'm the fourth guy from the left on the evolutionary chart,
Jay London Sayings: I was born nine months premature. I was born nine months premature.
Jay London Sayings: Does anybody know what I'm doing up here? Does anybody know what I'm doing up here?
Jay London Sayings: I told my therapist I was having nightmares about nuclear explosions. He said don't worry I told my therapist I was having nightmares about nuclear explosions. He said don't worry it's not the end of the world.
Jay London Sayings: I went to a record store and asked for 50 cent. They kicked me out I went to a record store and asked for 50 cent. They kicked me out for pan-handling.
Jay London Sayings: It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes. It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.
Jay London Sayings: I went to an audition the other day, they were casting 13 people to be I went to an audition the other day, they were casting 13 people to be clouds, 14 people showed up, it was overcast.
Jay London Sayings: A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked. A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked.
Jay London Sayings: I'm convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb - they I'm convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb - they diffused it.
Jay London Sayings: Did you know that today will never be tomorrow. Did you know that today will never be tomorrow.
Jay London Sayings: After all these years I had the privilege of naming my private part, cause we After all these years I had the privilege of naming my private part, cause we have nicknames. So I named my private part pride ... it's not much but at least I have my pride.
Jay London Sayings: I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm. I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm.
Jay London Sayings: My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings. My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings.
Jay London Sayings: I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody. I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.
Jay London Sayings: I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?
Jay London Sayings: I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me. I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.
Jay London Sayings: People read me but they don't subscribe. People read me but they don't subscribe.
Jay London Sayings: I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.
Jay London Sayings: At Motel 6 in Amish Country I wonder if they leave the light on for At Motel 6 in Amish Country I wonder if they leave the light on for you?
Jay London Sayings: I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.
Jay London Sayings: My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was shiftless.
Jay London Sayings: My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings.
Jay London Sayings: I saw a sign it said left lane closed so I went someplace else. I saw a sign it said left lane closed so I went someplace else.