Funny Country Famous Quotes & Sayings

100 Funny Country Famous Sayings, Quotes and Quotation.

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I wonder, what's in a book while it's closed. Oh, I know it's full of letters printed on paper, but all the same, something must be happening, because as soon as I open it, there's a whole story with people I don't know yet and all kinds of adventures, deeds and battles. And sometimes there are storms at sea, or it takes you to strange cities and countries. All those things are somehow shut in a book. Of course you have to read it to find out. But it's already there, that's the funny thing. I just wish I knew how it could be.Michael Ende Funny Country Sayings By Michael Ende: I wonder, what's in a book while it's closed. Oh, I know it's full of
This is a free country, madam. We have a right to share your privacy in a public place.Peter Ustinov Funny Country Sayings By Peter Ustinov: This is a free country, madam. We have a right to share your privacy in
I'm pretty open to all music. Its pretty funny because I've spent time in Germany and now I'm in Dallas where Country is a big thing. I used to hate it but now I can actually go through a song.Steve Purdy Funny Country Sayings By Steve Purdy: I'm pretty open to all music. Its pretty funny because I've spent time in Germany
Not so great in England at the moment; in an online poll we came last, we actually came bottom of European countries for quality of life, because of things like the weather, obviously, late retirement, poor holiday, poor public services, poor health service; it's basically just a kind of grey, godless wilderness, full of cold pies and broken dreams.Bill Bailey Funny Country Sayings By Bill Bailey: Not so great in England at the moment; in an online poll we came last,
I wil not calm down. My baby girl is moving halfway across the country."
"She's been moved away before," Dad pointed out.
"Yeah, but that was with Billy. We all knew he wouldn't work out. We're talking about Hank here. Look at him," she pointed to Hank.
"She's never coming home. Never.
Kristen Ashley Funny Country Sayings By Kristen Ashley: I wil not calm down. My baby girl is moving halfway across the country.""She's been
Trample the weak. Hurdle the dead.Attila The Hun Funny Country Sayings By Attila The Hun: Trample the weak. Hurdle the dead.
Now the country is in a terrible state and you've blamed it on a number of things - unemployment rate, the value of the pound, and all that. It's actually because the national anthem is boring.Billy Connolly Funny Country Sayings By Billy Connolly: Now the country is in a terrible state and you've blamed it on a number
Now I've wrestled alotta countries!Scott Steiner Funny Country Sayings By Scott Steiner: Now I've wrestled alotta countries!
France in August when you can travel through the entire country without encountering a single pesky Frenchman or being bothered with anything that's open for business.P. J. O'Rourke Funny Country Sayings By P. J. O'Rourke: France in August when you can travel through the entire country without encountering a single
Then with Lucy [Hale], her little thing that I kind of learned from her is her country music because she's obsessed with country and at the beginning, I wasn't a huge fan of it, but I was listening to some songs that she plays in the hair and makeup room and she's also so funny, too. She does these character impersonations and they're just so funny. Made up characters of course, but she can switch into someone else so fast. I'm always laughing at Lucy and she's like a little Polly Pocket, you know? The tiny one.Shay Mitchell Funny Country Sayings By Shay Mitchell: Then with Lucy [Hale], her little thing that I kind of learned from her is
It's a funny thing, in the US we all believe that we have a right to go to school. We have a right to a good education. And we don't. The U.S. Constitution contains no right for a child to go to school, let alone for a child to go to a good school. And yet, we know that if they don't go to a good school, they're less likely to be able to realize all that this country has to offer.Benjamin Jealous Funny Country Sayings By Benjamin Jealous: It's a funny thing, in the US we all believe that we have a right
I showed what I can do with butter, right? Eighty-five percent increase in sales. I'm very proud of them Country Life ads. They were funny and clever and classy like the Toblerone ads I grew up with.John Lydon Funny Country Sayings By John Lydon: I showed what I can do with butter, right? Eighty-five percent increase in sales. I'm
Military Wives - Sacrificing Months of Sex for the Country.Aditi Mathur Kumar Funny Country Sayings By Aditi Mathur Kumar: Military Wives - Sacrificing Months of Sex for the Country.
The government of my country snubs honest simplicity but fondles artistic villainy, and I think I might have developed into a very capable pickpocket if I had remained in the public service a year or two.Mark Twain Funny Country Sayings By Mark Twain: The government of my country snubs honest simplicity but fondles artistic villainy, and I think
American voices, country voices, high-pitched and without mercy. He lies freezing, wondering if the bedsprings will give him away. For possibly the first time he is hearing America as it must sound to a non-American. Later he will recall that what surprised him most was the fanaticism, the reliance not just on flat force but on the rightness of what they planned to do ... he'd been told long ago to expect this sort of thing from Nazis, and especially from Japs - we were the ones who always played fair - but this pair outside the door now are as demoralizing as a close-up of John Wayne (the angle emphasizing how slanted his eyes are, funny you never noticed before) screaming BANZAI!Thomas Pynchon Funny Country Sayings By Thomas Pynchon: American voices, country voices, high-pitched and without mercy. He lies freezing, wondering if the bedsprings
It's a funny thing because Britain was in a terrible state in those days. It limped from crisis to crisis. It was known as the Sick Man of Europe. It was in every way poorer than now. Yet there were flower beds in roundabouts, libraries and post offices in every village, cottage hospitals in abundance, council housing for all who needed it. It was a country so comfortable and enlightened that hospitals maintained cricket pitches for their staff and mental patients lived in Victorian palaces.Bill Bryson Funny Country Sayings By Bill Bryson: It's a funny thing because Britain was in a terrible state in those days. It
Rwandans have a funny relationship with God, which they convey through a story that anyone can tell you: "God worked very hard for six days creating the heavens and the earth. But on the seventh day, he needed a break, so he picked Rwanda as the place to take a much needed sleep. God sleeps in Rwanda, then keeps busy at work everywhere else."
This story has two meanings: The negative take is that God is not in Rwanda to protect you or answer your prayers, that He comes here only to shut His eyes. The other interpretation of "God sleeps in Rwanda" is that the country is a mile up, cooler and more beautiful than any other place, and so, naturally, this would be where God comes when He is not punching the clock. His favorite place. It was the second interpretation that we needed to believe.
Josh Ruxin Funny Country Sayings By Josh Ruxin: Rwandans have a funny relationship with God, which they convey through a story that anyone
It's about something that strikes you as funny but I do it with a Christian world view: why we think the way we do based on God's plan. I lift up my God and my country and I resist political correctness.Brad Stine Funny Country Sayings By Brad Stine: It's about something that strikes you as funny but I do it with a Christian
It's not funny at all that we do all that advertising for children. Why is advertising for children allowed? What possible reason can there be for having those effing adverts on TV for all this crap that's made by poor people in poor countries that we sell our children who have too much?Emma Thompson Funny Country Sayings By Emma Thompson: It's not funny at all that we do all that advertising for children. Why is
O, I do read Indian novels sometimes. But you know, Ms Rupinder, what we Indians want in literature, at least the kind written in English, is not literature at all, but flattery. We want to see ourselves depicted as soulful, sensitive, profound, valorous, wounded, tolerant and funny beings. All that Jhumpa Lahiri stuff. But the truth is, we are absolutely nothing of that kind. What are we, then, Ms Rupinder? We are animals of the jungle, who will eat our neighbour's children in five minutes, and our own in ten. Keep this in mind before you do any business in this country.Aravind Adiga Funny Country Sayings By Aravind Adiga: O, I do read Indian novels sometimes. But you know, Ms Rupinder, what we Indians
Are you wearing space pants?" Miranda asked him.
"What?"
How did it end? oh, right. "Because your butt is fine."
He gazed at her in that way he had like he was measuring her for straitjacket. "I think-" he started, then stopped and seemed to be having trouble talking. Cleared his throat three times before saying, "I think the line is 'because your butt is out of this world."
"Oh. That makes a lot more sense. I can see that. See, I read this book about how to get guys to like you and they said it was a line that never failed but i got interrupted in the middle and the line before it was about china-not the country, the kind you eat off of-and that is where the fine part was but i must have gotten them confused. He just kept staring at her.
Michele Jaffe Funny Country Sayings By Michele Jaffe: Are you wearing space pants?" Miranda asked him."What?"How did it end? oh, right. "Because your
The problem is that we live in an uptight country. Why don't we just laugh at ourselves? We are funny. Gays are funny. Straights are funny. Women are funny. Men are funny. We are all funny, and we all do funny things. Let's laugh about it.Bob Newhart Funny Country Sayings By Bob Newhart: The problem is that we live in an uptight country. Why don't we just laugh
Every Day Is for the Thief, by turns funny, mournful, and acerbic, offers a portrait of Nigeria in which anger, perhaps the most natural response to the often lamentable state of affairs there, is somehow muted and deflected by the author's deep engagement with the country: a profoundly disenchanted love. Teju Cole is among the most gifted writers of his generation.Salman Rushdie Funny Country Sayings By Salman Rushdie: Every Day Is for the Thief, by turns funny, mournful, and acerbic, offers a portrait
The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government.Thomas Paine Funny Country Sayings By Thomas Paine: The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government.
Funny how the U.S. sends in the military to fight "terrorists" in any country which has resources we want ...Ziad K. Abdelnour Funny Country Sayings By Ziad K. Abdelnour: Funny how the U.S. sends in the military to fight "terrorists" in any country which
I think with Sky and BBC Three and Channel 4, there are some great television platforms, and the stand-up movement in this country is phenomenal. It's like rock n' roll here. Britain's a funny place and there's a lot of funny people coming out of there and a lot of people are finding mediums to express themselves.Brendan Coyle Funny Country Sayings By Brendan Coyle: I think with Sky and BBC Three and Channel 4, there are some great television
Relaxing at home in his 55th-floor condominium before a game, Sammy Sosa is the same as at the ball park: focused but funny, exuberant but reserved. He is in a strange country, conversing in two languages, but his every movement displays a combination of confidence and humility.Bill Dedman Funny Country Sayings By Bill Dedman: Relaxing at home in his 55th-floor condominium before a game, Sammy Sosa is the same
If this were a courageous country,
it would ask Gloria to lead it
since she is sane and funny and beautiful and smart
and the National Leaders we've always had
are not.
When I listen to her talk about women's rights
children's rights
men's rights
I think of the long line of Americans
who should have been president, but weren't.
Imagine Crazy Horse as president. Sojourner Truth.
John Brown. Harriet Tubman. Black Elk or Geronimo.
Imagine President Martin Luther King confronting
the youthful "Oppie" Oppenheimer. Imagine President
Malcolm X going after the Klan. Imagine President Stevie
Wonder dealing with the "Truly Needy."
Imagine President Shirley Chisholm, Ron Dellums, or
Sweet Honey in the Rock
dealing with Anything.
It is imagining to make us weep with frustration,
as we languish under real estate dealers, killers,
and bad actors.
Alice Walker Funny Country Sayings By Alice Walker: If this were a courageous country,it would ask Gloria to lead itsince she is sane
We got a lot of politicians up there on Capital Hill. Ain't it funny how they prosper while the country stands still?Waylon Jennings Funny Country Sayings By Waylon Jennings: We got a lot of politicians up there on Capital Hill. Ain't it funny how
They've done away with those committees. That shows the success of what the Soviets were able to do in this country.Ronald Reagan Funny Country Sayings By Ronald Reagan: They've done away with those committees. That shows the success of what the Soviets were
MY ACT IS 'NOTHING BUT COMEDY. I TALK SOUTHERN BECAUSE I PICKED IT UP WHEN I MOVED TO THE SOUTH. IM NOT TRYING TO MAKE ANY SOCIAL POLITICAL POINT, NOR AM I TRYING TO MAKE FUN OF REDNECKS. I GREW UP A COUNTRY KID AND WILL ALWAYS BE ONE. I GREW UP WITH PEOPLE THAT SAID CERTAIN THINGS FUNNY AND I PREFORM USING THE SAME LANGUAGE BECAUSE I FIND IT HYSTERICLE. THATS IT. ITS A COMEDY SHOW THAT IS FUNNY AND THATS IT.Larry The Cable Guy Funny Country Sayings By Larry The Cable Guy: MY ACT IS 'NOTHING BUT COMEDY. I TALK SOUTHERN BECAUSE I PICKED IT UP WHEN
In a funny way, nothing makes you feel more like a native of your own country than to live where nearly everyone is not.Bill Bryson Funny Country Sayings By Bill Bryson: In a funny way, nothing makes you feel more like a native of your own
She'd done things to him he thought only happened to characters in country-western songs, laying waste to his car, his dogs, driving him from his home, and making an outlaw of him. It was almost funny.Joe Hill Funny Country Sayings By Joe Hill: She'd done things to him he thought only happened to characters in country-western songs, laying
Frankly, most of my friends hold very different political beliefs. It's just a funny thing in this country that supposedly you can't sit down and have dinner and enjoy another person's company if you don't have the same beliefs. It's ridiculous.Patricia Heaton Funny Country Sayings By Patricia Heaton: Frankly, most of my friends hold very different political beliefs. It's just a funny thing
Let's be honest, this is a consumer based economy in America. That's all we manufacture here is need and appetite. We are the world's mouth. They make things in other countries, and they're like, 'Send it to America; they'll eat it.'Marc Maron Funny Country Sayings By Marc Maron: Let's be honest, this is a consumer based economy in America. That's all we manufacture
She turns to us, acts surprised to see us, then does the bit with the back of the hand to the forehead. "You're lost!" "You're angry!" "You're in the wrong school!" "You're in the wrong country!" "You're on the wrong planet!Laurie Halse Anderson Funny Country Sayings By Laurie Halse Anderson: She turns to us, acts surprised to see us, then does the bit with the
Women can do anything men can do. Except math, chess, running, jumping, lifting stuff, fixing things, making money, hockey, surfing, driving, making decisions, being tall, taking out the garbage, tipping, fishing, being funny (on purpose), reading a map, listening to good bands, writing, running the country, inventing anything important, or being fun to hang out with.Daniel Tosh Funny Country Sayings By Daniel Tosh: Women can do anything men can do. Except math, chess, running, jumping, lifting stuff, fixing
Look around you. Watch how people function and interact with one another. You'll see this is going on everywhere all the time. People devour each other in the name of love, or family or country. But that's an excuse; they're just hungry and want to be fed. Read their faces, the newspapers, read what it says on their T-shirts! 'I think you're mistaking me for someone who gives a shit.' 'My parents went to London but all they brought me back was this lousy T-shirt.' 'So many women, so little time.' 'Whoever dies with the most toys, wins.' They're supposed to be funny, witty, and postmodern, Miranda. But the truth is they're only stating a fact: Me. I come first. Get out of my way.Jonathan Carroll Funny Country Sayings By Jonathan Carroll: Look around you. Watch how people function and interact with one another. You'll see this
Money in property is dead money. It doesn't help the country. It's funny how the U.K., Ireland and Spain are the most property-obsessed nations in Europe and yet are also the ones suffering the most.Peter Hargreaves Funny Country Sayings By Peter Hargreaves: Money in property is dead money. It doesn't help the country. It's funny how the
You ignorant whelp. You dare to warn me away from her? I created her. Without my influence, Charlotte would be a bovine in the country with a half-dozen children at her skirts ... or spreading her legs for every man who dropped a coin between her breasts. I've spent a fortune to make her into something far better than she was ever meant to be."
"Why don't you send me a bill?"
"It would beggar you," Radnor assured him with raw contempt.
"Send it anyway," Nick invited gently. "I'll be interested to learn the cost of creating someone.
Lisa Kleypas Funny Country Sayings By Lisa Kleypas: You ignorant whelp. You dare to warn me away from her? I created her. Without
It's just amazing how long this country has been going to hell without ever having got there.Andy Rooney Funny Country Sayings By Andy Rooney: It's just amazing how long this country has been going to hell without ever having
If you're ever feeling a lack of middle-aged white men, just pop into the Capitol. Not so much the House of Representatives, which has a bit more color and texture, but the Senate
jeez. Yes, let's have more testosterone running the country.
Maximum Ride, School's Out
Forever
James Patterson Funny Country Sayings By James Patterson: If you're ever feeling a lack of middle-aged white men, just pop into the Capitol.
People need external activity because they have no internal activity ... [Hence] the restlessness of those who have nothing to do, and their aimless traveling. What drives them from country to country is the same boredom which at home drives them together into such crowds and heaps it is funny to see.Arthur Schopenhauer Funny Country Sayings By Arthur Schopenhauer: People need external activity because they have no internal activity ... [Hence] the restlessness of
The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country.George W. Bush Funny Country Sayings By George W. Bush: The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country.
Funny how in a city of 750,000 one could feel so utterly alone and vulnerable - half a million people and no one to protect you. It's partially the nature of the location of Winnipeg. Alone in the Prairies, in the middle of the country, where the wind blows hard and the snow can pile up around your feet while you wait to cross the street.Jan Guenther Braun Funny Country Sayings By Jan Guenther Braun: Funny how in a city of 750,000 one could feel so utterly alone and vulnerable
And in the past, Archie wondered, was it just that fewer people cheated? Were they more honest, and did they leave their front doors open, did they leave their kids with the neighbors, pay social calls, run up tabs with the butcher? The funny thing about getting old in a country is people always want to hear that from you. They want to hear it really was once a green and pleasant land. They need it.Zadie Smith Funny Country Sayings By Zadie Smith: And in the past, Archie wondered, was it just that fewer people cheated? Were they
Some of the events in the Olympics don't make sense to me. I don't understand the connection to any reality ... Like in the Winter Olympics they have that biathlon that combines cross-country skiing with shooting a gun. How many alpine snipers are into this? Ski, shoot a gun ... ski, bang, bang, bang ... It's like combining swimming and strangling a guy. Why don't we have that? That makes absolutely as much sense to me. Just put people in the pool at the end of each lane for the swimmers.Jerry Seinfeld Funny Country Sayings By Jerry Seinfeld: Some of the events in the Olympics don't make sense to me. I don't understand
I do have a funny perception of mine I'd like to share. Being basically a lifetime poet. I've had many people say "I don't like poetry" But they'll listen to song after song that rhymes on the end in couplets Just a thought ...Stanley Victor Paskavich Funny Country Sayings By Stanley Victor Paskavich: I do have a funny perception of mine I'd like to share. Being basically a
When I consider that the noble animals have been exterminated here - the cougar, panther, lynx, wolverine, wolf, bear, moose, deer, the beaver, the turkey, etc, etc - I cannot but feel as I lived in a tamed, and, as it were, emasculated country.Henry David Thoreau Funny Country Sayings By Henry David Thoreau: When I consider that the noble animals have been exterminated here - the cougar, panther,
Countries are making nuclear weapons like there is no tomorrow.Emo Philips Funny Country Sayings By Emo Philips: Countries are making nuclear weapons like there is no tomorrow.
But you see, a rich country like America can perhaps afford to be stupid.Barack Obama Funny Country Sayings By Barack Obama: But you see, a rich country like America can perhaps afford to be stupid.
We moved to Baltimore, Maryland, in 1979, when I was five. The funny thing is that, even though Baltimore had one of the top murder rates in the country in those days, I grew up hearing about how dangerous New York was.Philipp Meyer Funny Country Sayings By Philipp Meyer: We moved to Baltimore, Maryland, in 1979, when I was five. The funny thing is
And she said it was a pity, because my father was so "keen", and what did I care about?
So I said, well, I was not quite sure, but on the whole I thought I liked having everything very tidy and calm all around me, and not being bothered to do things, and laughing at the kind of joke other people didn't think at all funny, and going for country walks, and not being asked to express opinions about things (like love, and isn't so-and-so peculiar?). So then she said, oh, well, didn't I think I could try to be a little less slack, because of Father, and I said no, I was I afraid I couldn't; and after that she left me alone. But all the others still said I was no good.
Stella Gibbons Funny Country Sayings By Stella Gibbons: And she said it was a pity, because my father was so "keen", and what
So the president is like, "Well, once upon a time it was Congress's job to decide whether or not we attacked countries, so let's let them decide." Which is funny, because, as we all know, if Congress were on fire, Congress could not pass the "Pour Water on Congress Act".Hank Green Funny Country Sayings By Hank Green: So the president is like, "Well, once upon a time it was Congress's job to
What's great about stand-up is that you can say whatever you want and go around the country, and sometimes the world, and work on it and see how people react. You don't need Standards & Practices or notes from lawyers or producers to tell you what's funny.Natasha Leggero Funny Country Sayings By Natasha Leggero: What's great about stand-up is that you can say whatever you want and go around
Who knows what kind of marriage they have? The kinds of marriage people have in this country, Bo, very strange. It's not like back home where a man can do as he sees fit and a woman follows him. Over here it's reversed. Women tell their men what they want and the men do it, because they say happy wife, happy life. This society is funny.Imbolo Mbue Funny Country Sayings By Imbolo Mbue: Who knows what kind of marriage they have? The kinds of marriage people have in
A lot of movies that come from Israel are about war, but there is such good, funny, rounded writing that comes from the country that I wish more people would discover.Odeya Rush Funny Country Sayings By Odeya Rush: A lot of movies that come from Israel are about war, but there is such
It's so funny because people always think of me as being a little bit country or assume that I am from the South - I don't know why!Megan Hilty Funny Country Sayings By Megan Hilty: It's so funny because people always think of me as being a little bit country
Presently she began again. 'I wonder if I shall fall right through the earth! How funny it'll seem to come out among the people that walk with their heads downward! The Antipathies, I think
' (she was rather glad there WAS no one listening, this time, as it didn't sound at all the right word) '
but I shall have to ask them what the name of the country is, you
Lewis Carroll Funny Country Sayings By Lewis Carroll: Presently she began again. 'I wonder if I shall fall right through the earth! How
I guess what I always found funny was the human condition. There is a certain comedy and pathos to trouble and accidents. Like, when a driver has parked his car crookedly and then wonders why he has the bad luck of being hit.John Prine Funny Country Sayings By John Prine: I guess what I always found funny was the human condition. There is a certain
Veil, you see, if I vas to say something portentous like "zer dark eyes of zer mind" back home in Uberwald, zer would be a sudden crash of thunder,' said Otto. 'And if I vas to point at a castle on a towering crag and say "Yonder is ... zer castle" a volf would be bound to howl mournfully.' He sighed. 'In zer old country, zer scenery is psychotropic and knows vot is expected of it. Here, alas, people just look at you in a funny vay.Terry Pratchett Funny Country Sayings By Terry Pratchett: Veil, you see, if I vas to say something portentous like "zer dark eyes of
I wouldn't be caught dead sacrificing myself for this country.Sol Luckman Funny Country Sayings By Sol Luckman: I wouldn't be caught dead sacrificing myself for this country.
Cottontail knocked on the big front door and was admitted to the Palace. There she stood in her funny country clothes but none of the other four Easter Bunnies laughed, for they were wise and kind and knew better.DuBose Heyward Funny Country Sayings By DuBose Heyward: Cottontail knocked on the big front door and was admitted to the Palace. There she
On the whole I thought I liked having everything very tidy and calm all around me, and not being bothered to do things, and laughing at the kind of joke other people didn't think at all funny, and going for country walks, and not being asked to express opinions about things (like love, and isn't so-and-so peculiar?)Stella Gibbons Funny Country Sayings By Stella Gibbons: On the whole I thought I liked having everything very tidy and calm all around
Playing in Italy was like being in a foreign country.Ian Rush Funny Country Sayings By Ian Rush: Playing in Italy was like being in a foreign country.
Funny how a melody sounds like a memory.Eric Church Funny Country Sayings By Eric Church: Funny how a melody sounds like a memory.
Mitt Romney will travel to London where he will attend the Olympics opening ceremony. Of course it's going ot be weird when they're announcing all the countries, and he's like 'Got a bank account there, got one there, two bank accounts there.'Jimmy Fallon Funny Country Sayings By Jimmy Fallon: Mitt Romney will travel to London where he will attend the Olympics opening ceremony. Of
I spent my childhood scrambling round badgers and foxes and playing fantastic country kid games like knocking on people's doors and running away. God that was a good game.Bill Bailey Funny Country Sayings By Bill Bailey: I spent my childhood scrambling round badgers and foxes and playing fantastic country kid games
Pop culture. Nobody does bullshit better than us. Right? China took over manufacturing. And the Middle East has us on fossil fuels. That's just geography and politics. We're a nation of whacko immigrants. Scavengers and con men. We crossed the ocean on faith, stole some land and stone-cold made up a whole country out of nothing but balls and bullshit. Superhero comics got invented by crazy genius Jews who showed up and revamped the refugee experience into a Man of Steel sent from Krypton with a secret identity.Damon Suede Funny Country Sayings By Damon Suede: Pop culture. Nobody does bullshit better than us. Right? China took over manufacturing. And the
The first time I passed through the country (Switzerland) I had the impression it was swept down with a broom from one end to the other every morning by housewives who dumped all the dirt in Italy.Ernesto Sabato Funny Country Sayings By Ernesto Sabato: The first time I passed through the country (Switzerland) I had the impression it was
The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.David Cross Funny Country Sayings By David Cross: The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other
Women and people of color and young people especially are about to have this amazing opportunity to shift the political conversation in this country for the good of all of us, toward more progressive policies, and it's a really amazing and important time to be part of that.Sandra Fluke Funny Country Sayings By Sandra Fluke: Women and people of color and young people especially are about to have this amazing
The U.S. team has swept all the medals in the skeet shooting event. So despite our bad economy, it's nice to know our country has never been safer from an attack of skeets.Conan O'Brien Funny Country Sayings By Conan O'Brien: The U.S. team has swept all the medals in the skeet shooting event. So despite
Coca-Cola remains emblematic of the best and worst of America and Western civilization. The history of Coca-Cola is the often funny story of a group of men obsessed with putting a trivial soft drink "within an arm's reach of desire." But at the same time, it is a microcosm of American history. Coca-Cola grew up with the country, shaping and shaped by the times. The drink not only helped to alter consumption patterns, but attitudes toward leisure, work, advertising, sex, family life, and patriotism.Mark Pendergrast Funny Country Sayings By Mark Pendergrast: Coca-Cola remains emblematic of the best and worst of America and Western civilization. The history
Roosevelt could always keep ahead with his work, but I cannot do it, and I know it is a grievous fault, but it is too late to remedy it. The country must take me as it found me. Wasn't it your mother who had a servant girl who said it was no use for her to try to hurry, that she was a "Sunday chil" and no "Sunday chil" could hurry? I don't think I am a Sunday child, but I ought to have been; then I would have had an excuse for always being late.William Howard Taft Funny Country Sayings By William Howard Taft: Roosevelt could always keep ahead with his work, but I cannot do it, and I
The European countries are really hoping to do well in the Olympics. If they win gold medals, they can use them as cash.David Letterman Funny Country Sayings By David Letterman: The European countries are really hoping to do well in the Olympics. If they win
The United States was a big country where everybody wore funny t-shirts and ate too much.Adam Rex Funny Country Sayings By Adam Rex: The United States was a big country where everybody wore funny t-shirts and ate too
Trying to assassinate the president should not be funny. It really shouldn't. It's not like I was cracking up when we read about Lincoln or JFK. But let's face it, they were real presidents. Gerald Ford ranks right up there with Millard Fillmore and Bush the First on the list of unexciting white men who have run this country, made their way into history books, and otherwise been human sleeping pills. If all the presidents had been television shows, Gerald Ford would probably have been a PBS fund drive. So I'd bet the fact that anyone would try to kill Gerald Ford, Gerald Rudolph Ford, was kind of hard to get excited about, even back in the day.Alison Umminger Funny Country Sayings By Alison Umminger: Trying to assassinate the president should not be funny. It really shouldn't. It's not like
America is a magical place, and I think my job, or the job of a lot of us European filmmakers is to just hold up America to Americans and present it to you in a new way. All I wanted to do is in a funny way say, "Look at your country. It's magnificent."Hans Zimmer Funny Country Sayings By Hans Zimmer: America is a magical place, and I think my job, or the job of a
I was employed as a salesman, selling a marvelous tea that could cure all ills. Funny, don't you think? I have never lied so much in my life, I traveled all over the country, selling my miraculous tea to whoever would believe me. I never felt guilty about it. The tea didn't do any harm, I can assure you, and my words gave such hope to those who bought it that I reckon they might still owe me money, because hope is beyond price.Jose Saramago Funny Country Sayings By Jose Saramago: I was employed as a salesman, selling a marvelous tea that could cure all ills.
And regardless of the fact that in this country, certainly in the arts, we treat comedy as a second-class citizen, I've never thought of it that way. I've always thought it to be important. The last time I looked, the Greeks were holding up two masks. I've always thought of it not only as having equal value, but as the craft of it, being funny.Jeff Daniels Funny Country Sayings By Jeff Daniels: And regardless of the fact that in this country, certainly in the arts, we treat
They are not testing comics for drugs. If our job is dependent on that, there would be three working comics in the country, and two of them would have puppets.Marc Maron Funny Country Sayings By Marc Maron: They are not testing comics for drugs. If our job is dependent on that, there
I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days.Jon Stewart Funny Country Sayings By Jon Stewart: I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the
The fish is that perfect, amazing guy it can never work out with - you know, a bird and a fish may fall in love - but where would they live? . . . So the fish is your total dream guy, he's smart, he's handsome, he gets all your jokes, he loves to talk, he gives you a nine-hour orgasm and then makes you homemade chocolate chip pancakes and serves you breakfast in bed - but he lives all the way across the country and neither of you can move, or he's married, or next in line for the throne, or he has a terminal disease or something . . . the fish.Lisa Daily Funny Country Sayings By Lisa Daily: The fish is that perfect, amazing guy it can never work out with - you
I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks.Zach Galifianakis Funny Country Sayings By Zach Galifianakis: I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks.
Gone are the days when the old country doctor would drive out to your house and amputate your infected leg for a basket of goose eggs and a rhubarb pie.Cuthbert Soup Funny Country Sayings By Cuthbert Soup: Gone are the days when the old country doctor would drive out to your house
Ohio is a scale model of the entire country, jammed into 43,000 square miles. Cleveland views itself as the intellectual East (its citizens believe they have a rivalry with Boston and unironically classify the banks of Lake Erie as the North Coast). Cincinnati is the actual South (they fly Confederate flags and eat weird food). Dayton is the Midwest. Toledo is Pittsburgh, before Pittsburgh was nice. Columbus is a low-altitude Denver, minus the New World Order airport. Ohio experiences all possible US weather, sometimes simultaneously.Chuck Klosterman Funny Country Sayings By Chuck Klosterman: Ohio is a scale model of the entire country, jammed into 43,000 square miles. Cleveland
In my own country, I play light comedies and funny parts.Carice Van Houten Funny Country Sayings By Carice Van Houten: In my own country, I play light comedies and funny parts.
Talk about burning the flag and he gets all choked up. Funny, so many of these guys think the country stands for the flag instead of the other way around.Sheri S. Tepper Funny Country Sayings By Sheri S. Tepper: Talk about burning the flag and he gets all choked up. Funny, so many of
We, as Americans, at least - I mean, I love my country - but we're so self-righteous sometimes, in terms of, like, our nationality, our country. But we're people from somewhere else; the true 'Americans' are the original peoples. It's funny, but we're a very territorial species.Peter Dinklage Funny Country Sayings By Peter Dinklage: We, as Americans, at least - I mean, I love my country - but we're
I think the scores for Olympic gymnastics are affected by what countries the judge and the gymnast are from. That's wrong. That type of political pandering isn't meant for gymnastic Olympic events. It's meant for the Supreme Court.Craig Ferguson Funny Country Sayings By Craig Ferguson: I think the scores for Olympic gymnastics are affected by what countries the judge and
She was convinced the country was about to succumb to revolutionary socialism. Her own circumstances encouraged this belief: just on the edge of the really rich country set, she shared their views and opinions but lacked the financial and architechtural insulation from real or imagined political troubles. She found crushed larger cans and cigarette packets in her front garden and interpreted these as menacing signals from the Perthshire proletariat. Every flicker and dim of electric light was a portent of class war.James Robertson Funny Country Sayings By James Robertson: She was convinced the country was about to succumb to revolutionary socialism. Her own circumstances
When people visit my farm they often envision their dog, finally off-leash in acres of safely fenced countryside, running like Lassie in a television show, leaping over fallen tree trunks, shiny-eyed with joy at the change to run free in the country. While they're imagining that heartwarming scene, their dog is most likely gobbling up sheep poop as fast as he can. Dog aren't people, and if they have their own image of heaven, it most likely involves poop.Patricia B. McConnell Funny Country Sayings By Patricia B. McConnell: When people visit my farm they often envision their dog, finally off-leash in acres of
I am just an old country boy in a big town trying to get along. I have been eating pretty regular and the reason I have been is because I have stayed an old country boy.Will Rogers Funny Country Sayings By Will Rogers: I am just an old country boy in a big town trying to get along.
Assad whistled a few notes of one of his native country's melancholic songs. It sounded as though he was whistling backwardsJussi Adler-Olsen Funny Country Sayings By Jussi Adler-Olsen: Assad whistled a few notes of one of his native country's melancholic songs. It sounded
This is indeed a funny country. Yesterday, for example, we were in a cafe which is one of the best in Cairo, and there were, at the same time as ourselves, inside, a donkey shitting, and a gentleman who was pissing in a corner. No one finds that odd; no one says anything.Gustave Flaubert Funny Country Sayings By Gustave Flaubert: This is indeed a funny country. Yesterday, for example, we were in a cafe which
Do you know what happens when you play a country song backwards? You get your wife back, your dog back and your job back.Richard Belzer Funny Country Sayings By Richard Belzer: Do you know what happens when you play a country song backwards? You get your
Because my musical background is so diverse, it lends me to have very much my own style and it helps me to relate to the music as I'm going to play it. I just write. And if it comes out country, it's a country song. The funny thing is, I write all across the board. I just write what hits me at the time.Casey James Funny Country Sayings By Casey James: Because my musical background is so diverse, it lends me to have very much my
There's lots of sides. The CD doesn't really create a mood. It creates more of a journey. It starts out with a simple bluegrass tune, sort of melancholy and sad, like "Lovin' and Lyin'," then it's sexy and there's some funny songs in there where I'm talking, like "Designated Drunk." There's a humor side, a sexy side, but there's also a pretty sad side, the country side. It's the backwards side of me!Laura Bell Bundy Funny Country Sayings By Laura Bell Bundy: There's lots of sides. The CD doesn't really create a mood. It creates more of
God ... my self in the Bronx always says that God has a funny sense of humor..He has a way of treating things, he deals with each individual soul delicately, tenderly, compassionately but he deals with groups of people [country] according to certain laws and he always observes those laws and that means the innocent are punished with the evil.Malachi Martin Funny Country Sayings By Malachi Martin: God ... my self in the Bronx always says that God has a funny sense