Out Of My Mind Funny Famous Quotes & Sayings

66 Out Of My Mind Funny Famous Sayings, Quotes and Quotation.

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By morning, Adelaide was beginning to understand why she'd never completely understood how God worked. Given that He had made the bewildering, maddening, incomprehensible species that was man from His own image, it stood to reason that the Creator would be a complicated mass of logic never meant to be understood by the female mind. That, or the fall of man in the Garden of Eden had taken them even further off the path than she'd ever realizedKristi Ann Hunter Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Kristi Ann Hunter: By morning, Adelaide was beginning to understand why she'd never completely understood how God worked.
I don't kill flies but I like to mess with their minds. I hold them above globes. They freak out and yell, 'Whoa, I'm way too high!'Bruce Baum Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Bruce Baum: I don't kill flies but I like to mess with their minds. I hold them
I have only one heart to give and one mind to lose. May I someday find a woman who will take them both.Michael W. Grimard Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Michael W. Grimard: I have only one heart to give and one mind to lose. May I someday
I think therefore I am not sure.Ljupka Cvetanova Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Ljupka Cvetanova: I think therefore I am not sure.
The first thing that went wrong, according to Fat, had to do with the radio. Listening to it one night- he had not been able to sleep for a long time- he heard the radio saying hideous words, sentences which it could not be saying. Beth, being asleep, missed that. So that could have been Fat's mind breaking down; by then his psyche was disintegrating at a terrible velocity.
Mental illness is not funny.
Philip K. Dick Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Philip K. Dick: The first thing that went wrong, according to Fat, had to do with the radio.
Ivanov: I am a bad, pathetic and worthless individual. One needs to be pathetic, too, worn out and drained by drink, like Pasha, to be still fond of me and to respect me. My God, how I despise myself! I so deeply loathe my voice, my walk, my hands, these clothes, my thoughts. Well, isn't that funny, isn't that shocking? Less than a year ago I was healthy and strong, I was cheerful, tireless, passionate, I worked with these very hands, I could speak to move even Philistines to tears, I could cry when I saw grief, I became indignant when I encountered evil. I knew inspiration, I knew the charm and poetry of quiet nights when from dusk to dawn you sit at your desk or indulge you mind with dreams. I believed, I looked into the future as into the eyes of my own mother ... And now, my God, I am exhausted, I do not believe, I spend my days and nights in idleness.Anton Chekhov Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Anton Chekhov: Ivanov: I am a bad, pathetic and worthless individual. One needs to be pathetic, too,
"Vell," said Mr. Weller, "Now I s'pose he'll want to call some witnesses to speak to his character, or p'raps to prove a alleybi. I've been a turnin' the bis'ness over in my mind, and he may make his-self easy, Sammy. I've got some friends as'll do either for him, but my adwice 'ud be this here-never mind the character, and stick to the alleybi. Nothing like a alleybi, Sammy, nothing."Charles Dickens Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Charles Dickens: "Vell," said Mr. Weller, "Now I s'pose he'll want to call some witnesses to speak
Isn't it funny that at Christmas something in you gets so lonely for - I don't know what exactly, but it's something that you don't mind so much not having at other times.Kate Langley Bosher Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Kate Langley Bosher: Isn't it funny that at Christmas something in you gets so lonely for - I
This one commercial said, "Forget everything you know about slipcovers." So I did, and it was a load off of my mind. Then the commercial tried to sell slipcovers, but I didn't know what they were!Mitch Hedberg Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Mitch Hedberg: This one commercial said, "Forget everything you know about slipcovers." So I did, and it
People are often wary of reading or watching anything in the horror genre because in their minds, it's just senseless gore, death and violence. Well, I can tell you from avid experience, that's not what horror is about. The horror genre teaches us that sometimes really bad things happen to really good people, but that hope always prevails in even the darkest of situations. That's a very important lesson, no matter how frightening you think the teacher is, and to be in the top of her class, all you need to do is to go in with an open mind.Rebecca McNutt Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Rebecca McNutt: People are often wary of reading or watching anything in the horror genre because in
And while my mind is telling me I'm flirting with her just to prove a point, my body wants to play you show me your perky privates and I'll show you mine.Simone Elkeles Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Simone Elkeles: And while my mind is telling me I'm flirting with her just to prove a
It's because you aren't thinking very clearly tonight."
"I know. Being Drunk is weird."
"Oh my god. I love you so much. Especially when you say stuff like that."
"Like what?"
"Nothing. Never mind. Although I'm dying to know why your shoe is green.
Jessica Sorensen Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Jessica Sorensen: It's because you aren't thinking very clearly tonight.""I know. Being Drunk is weird.""Oh my god.
My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate.Chelsea Handler Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Chelsea Handler: My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own
You've come to give me a piece of your mind. You know that phrase is really beautiful. The mind is the most powerful thing in the body. Whatever the mind believes, the body can achieve. So to give someone a piece of it ... well thank you. Funny how people are always intent on giving it to the people they dislike when it really should be for the ones they love.Cecelia Ahern Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Cecelia Ahern: You've come to give me a piece of your mind. You know that phrase is
I have a mind like a steel trap. Stuff gets in there and WHAM! it never gets back out again.Bill Austin Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Bill Austin: I have a mind like a steel trap. Stuff gets in there and WHAM! it
He's always asking: 'Is that new? I haven't seen that before.' It's like, Why don't you mind your own business? Solve world hunger. Get out of my closet.Michelle Obama Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Michelle Obama: He's always asking: 'Is that new? I haven't seen that before.' It's like, Why don't
Love is a state of mind which has nothing to do with the mind.Bob Phillips Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Bob Phillips: Love is a state of mind which has nothing to do with the mind.
I've done this sort of thing before. Not prophecies so much, but you'd be surprised how many people want to realign their ancestral lines to seem nobler, or rewrite their family history to remove more morally questionable episodes." He paused to recall a recent rewrite. "One lord wanted the murderers removed from his family line. His family was so corrupt, he ended up with three virgin births, two generations removed entirely and a lady who gave birth at the age of two. Still, no one questions it as there is evidence in the archives." Bubo smugly tapped a book. "There is one thing though, faking a prophecy in the past is easy, you already know the result. How will you make this come true in the future?"
"I have someone in mind for it, but I'm not sure he'll go for it. But then prophecy is all optional anyway." Corvid looked up as if a thought had occurred to him. "I'd best go check on my man, I've not met him yet.
Dylan Perry Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Dylan Perry: I've done this sort of thing before. Not prophecies so much, but you'd be surprised
It's funny when you know you're playing two characters and you're aware of how you have to play each one into your performance of the other. You're constantly at the back of your mind thinking and it all gets a bit confusing.Jamie Dornan Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Jamie Dornan: It's funny when you know you're playing two characters and you're aware of how you
It's funny how fast a book goes, but how slow the wait appears.
the book may end, but the mind still thinks ... waiting for that book
see? I became a poet!
Nandanie Phalgoo Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Nandanie Phalgoo: It's funny how fast a book goes, but how slow the wait appears.the book may
Some say Twitter is overrated.
Some love it, others hate it.
I guess it depends on what you've got,
If you have guts to write a funny plot!
Ana Claudia Antunes Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Ana Claudia Antunes: Some say Twitter is overrated.Some love it, others hate it.I guess it depends on what
Listening to your own mind gives you "good reasons" why you should be fearful over unexpected events is just like being friends with someone who thinks it's funny to find new ways to hurt you!Guy Finley Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Guy Finley: Listening to your own mind gives you "good reasons" why you should be fearful over
Well, now," Mrs. Havisham said, all but purring as she leaned forward, ample cleavage on display. "You've grown up, haven't you? Tell me, Gustavo. What are your thoughts on having an experienced lover?"
"Not many," Gus said. "In fact, none at all. Also? I came out when I was thirteen. You were there. As was the whole town. Pastor Tommy announced it at the Fall Harvest Festival. On stage. Into a microphone. There was apple pie afterward."
"Still?" she said with an exaggerated pout.
"Yes," Gus said, deadpan as he could make it. "Still. Funny how that works."
"Well, if you change your mind, you know where to find me," she said, dragging a pink fingernail down his arm. "My door is always open. Like my body."
"That's not even remotely healthy," Gus said with a sniff.
"Maybe that's why I need your protein," she said with a wink.
"Nope," Gus said. "Nope, nope, nope."
"You sure about that?"
"Maybe you should close that door. And your legs.
T.J. Klune Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By T.J. Klune: Well, now," Mrs. Havisham said, all but purring as she leaned forward, ample cleavage on
The dreams fresh on her mind, she wrote about the Ada she remembered. The obituary wasn't the sad, plodding list of mother and father, dead children, and surviving family. It honored a strong, funny woman. She proofed it a second time with a smile on her face. Ada would have slapped her knee and crowed along with her.Laura Trentham Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Laura Trentham: The dreams fresh on her mind, she wrote about the Ada she remembered. The obituary
I glance at him. He's looking at me, his expression every bit as expectant as I feel. I hate this little game of ours. Maybe because I'm no good at it. He won't tell me more unless I ask. Curiosity is one of my most incurable flaws
and Galen knows it.
Still, I already gave up a perfectly good tantrum for him, so I feel like he owes me. Never mind that he saved my life today. That was so two hours ago.
Anna Banks Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Anna Banks: I glance at him. He's looking at me, his expression every bit as expectant as
When approaching a prospective human, first ask them what their name is.

* If it replies "Brains," blow its fucking head off.
* If it replies "Brian," ask it again, as you may have encountered a zombie with a speech impediment, or a zombie that was mildly retarded in life.
* Keep in mind that it is entirely possible that you did encounter a human named "Brian.
Shamus McCarty Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Shamus McCarty: When approaching a prospective human, first ask them what their name is. * If it
My mind absorbs things in a funny way. I'm on planes quite a bit and I always take stacks and stacks of magazines and I go through them and tear pages out and fold them up, and they get stuck at the bottom of my backpack or whatever.Marc Jacobs Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Marc Jacobs: My mind absorbs things in a funny way. I'm on planes quite a bit and
When anybody laughs, he has no mind, no thought, no problem, no suffering.H.W.L. Poonja Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By H.W.L. Poonja: When anybody laughs, he has no mind, no thought, no problem, no suffering.
What your mind sees when you close your eyes marks the entrance to an endless universe: your imagination.Stephen Helmes Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Stephen Helmes: What your mind sees when you close your eyes marks the entrance to an endless
They call me the confuser. Is he a man ... is he a woman? Ooh, I'm not sure if I mind.Noel Fielding Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Noel Fielding: They call me the confuser. Is he a man ... is he a woman? Ooh,
Why are we so addicted to social media?
Because, our limbic system is craving for rewards, pleasure, acceptance and expansion through mind.
Saurabh Sharma Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Saurabh Sharma: Why are we so addicted to social media?Because, our limbic system is craving for rewards,
You have a mind like the rings of Saturn. A million miles wide and an inch deep.Kim Stanley Robinson Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Kim Stanley Robinson: You have a mind like the rings of Saturn. A million miles wide and an
Shit. The mind gets up to funny tricks, doesn't it? Shadows grow faces.Stephen King Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Stephen King: Shit. The mind gets up to funny tricks, doesn't it? Shadows grow faces.
They're really into it, laughing and teasing each other, and I am looking at Pam and thinking once again how she is the most beautiful creature I have ever seen and that if we were back in the olden times she might have been made into a goddess because she is so beautiful. Sometimes I cannot stop my mind. It's scary.James Howe Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By James Howe: They're really into it, laughing and teasing each other, and I am looking at Pam
I'll walk up to a woman, I'll say the first thing that comes to mind: 'Hey, you hungry?'Gabriel Iglesias Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Gabriel Iglesias: I'll walk up to a woman, I'll say the first thing that comes to mind:
Some call-in moderators are neutral and courteous. Then there's Rush Limbaugh, who is funny and pompous and a scapegoater and hatemonger. His popularity could cause you to draw some terrible conclusions about the state of mind of the American people. It helps to remember that Bill Cosby is popular, too.Donella Meadows Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Donella Meadows: Some call-in moderators are neutral and courteous. Then there's Rush Limbaugh, who is funny and
I love funny women, and just being around them talking is fine with me. I love an interesting mind.Curtis Jackson Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Curtis Jackson: I love funny women, and just being around them talking is fine with me. I
It was kind of scary because working with Woody Allen becomes sort of a big deal in your mind. He directs in that Woody Allen character some of the time - he has these idiosyncrasies that are really charming and funny.Radha Mitchell Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Radha Mitchell: It was kind of scary because working with Woody Allen becomes sort of a big
And it's funny how when somebody saves you, the first thing you want to do is save other people. All other people. Everybody. The kid never knew the man's name. But he never forgot that smile. "Hero" isn't the first word, but it's the first word that comes to mind.Chuck Palahniuk Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Chuck Palahniuk: And it's funny how when somebody saves you, the first thing you want to do
Are you prepared?" she asked when the other Valkyries had their passengers in place.
"Sure," Matt said. "But we could use a soundtrack this time. Maybe a little Wagner. Da-da-da DUM dum."
Hildar looked back at hiim blankly.
"Wagner? Ride of the Valkyries? Da-da-da...Er, never mind."
"Oh!" Baldwin said. "I know that one!"
"Don't feed the geek," Fen muttered.
"Hey," Matt said. "I'm not a-"
"Oh, yeah, you are, Thorsen. You really are," Fen said in a voice that might have been teasing.
M.A. Marr Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By M.A. Marr: Are you prepared?" she asked when the other Valkyries had their passengers in place."Sure," Matt
My heart's so light it floats and carries me so my feet don't walk. I sing all day and I don't mind the washing, and that's how I know I'm in love. Completely smitten with My Lord the cat.Shannon Hale Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Shannon Hale: My heart's so light it floats and carries me so my feet don't walk. I
My heart broke and my mind opened, tragedy works in a funny way like that ~ what once tore me apart was actually what was setting my truth free.Nikki Rowe Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Nikki Rowe: My heart broke and my mind opened, tragedy works in a funny way like that
It's funny how a song can start in your mind, and then when it goes through all the filters, it ends up in a totally different spot.Jenny Lewis Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Jenny Lewis: It's funny how a song can start in your mind, and then when it goes
I like the public hot-tub at the hotels. I like when a guy is already in there, I say, "Hey, do you mind if I join you?" Then I go turn the heat up, and I add some carrots and onions.Mitch Hedberg Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Mitch Hedberg: I like the public hot-tub at the hotels. I like when a guy is already
Laughing, how can you fall asleep? It brings a state of no-mind and no-thought, and does not allow you to fall asleep.Rajneesh Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Rajneesh: Laughing, how can you fall asleep? It brings a state of no-mind and no-thought, and
Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex, and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she's hosting the world's biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all hot. Hot and understanding. Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don't mind, I'm the Cool Girl.Gillian Flynn Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Gillian Flynn: Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football,
Fredrika Bimm, what do you think you're doing?"
"Freaking out. Losing my mind. Thinking about snapping your husband's spine. Squashing the urge to vomit. Wishing I had died at childbirth."
"Oh, you say that when you don't get a prize in your Lucky Charms.
MaryJanice Davidson Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By MaryJanice Davidson: Fredrika Bimm, what do you think you're doing?""Freaking out. Losing my mind. Thinking about snapping
There is a Zen story (very funny - ha-ha) about a monk who, having failed to achieve "enlightenment" (brain-change) through the normal Zen methods, was told by his teacher to think of nothing but an ox. Day after day after day, the monk thought of the ox, visualized the ox, meditated on the ox. Finally, one day, the teacher came to the monk's cell and said, "Come out here - I want to talk to you." "I can't get out," the monk said. "My horns won't fit through the door." I can't get out . . . At these words, the monk was "enlightened." Never mind what "enlightenment" means, right now. The monk went through some species of brain change, obviously. He had developed the delusion that he was an ox, and awakening from that hypnoidal state he saw through the mechanism of all other delusions and how they robotize us. EXERCIZESRobert Anton Wilson Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Robert Anton Wilson: There is a Zen story (very funny - ha-ha) about a monk who, having failed
It's funny how happiness can elude you for so long, and then you find out it's as easy as changing your mind."

---From "Hearts Reunited" (book 2 of the Law of Attraction trilogy) by Jeane Watier
Jeane Watier Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Jeane Watier: It's funny how happiness can elude you for so long, and then you find out
In the back of my mind, I'm composing a tweet to make this funny somehow. Hashtag #awkwardparentmoments. It would probably trend on Twitter. I want to laugh at this to make the whole situation less real.Janet Gurtler Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Janet Gurtler: In the back of my mind, I'm composing a tweet to make this funny somehow.
She could sit around listening to her heart breaking, or she could go watch a grown man piss himself.
"How crossed are her eyes?" Dove asked.
Duke gave her the shit-eating grin of victory. "So fucking crossed that she can see herself change her mind.
Debra Anastasia Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Debra Anastasia: She could sit around listening to her heart breaking, or she could go watch a
It's funny; people get so doctrinaire about music. It should be the last thing you don't have an open mind about.Randy Newman Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Randy Newman: It's funny; people get so doctrinaire about music. It should be the last thing you
It's funny the things that go through your mind when you're getting the shit kicked out of you. As Bruce Willis' fist came crashing into my face, I thought about that old Shakespeare quote Father Bernard used to throw around back at Holy Name. Something about you only play with a lion when he's a frisky young cub, not when he's an old one, dying. Bruce knew when he agreed to work with me that his career was just about over. He was a lion, once, but now he was just an old one, dying. And I was the only guy around to blame. And man did his fist make that point. Repeatedly.Kevin Smith Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Kevin Smith: It's funny the things that go through your mind when you're getting the shit kicked
I couldn't figure out if it was fate or faith that had brought me there. How funny those two words sounded when paired together. One was the inevitable, something I could not change in my life, while the other was the hope and belief that I could. These two words were enemies of each other, and one of them was down right dangerous for a slave to have anywhere near his mind.Jay Grewal Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Jay Grewal: I couldn't figure out if it was fate or faith that had brought me there.
Your mother can't hear you here."
"Distance is no match for my mother's eavesdropping and mind-reading skills."

"I had steel anti-mind-reading plates installed this week. Specially designed to be Marilyn-proof. Also sounds an alarm if she gets within two hundred yards of the building, and I sent the guards downstairs to ninja training. You're safe.
Jamie Farrell Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Jamie Farrell: Your mother can't hear you here." "Distance is no match for my mother's eavesdropping and
You do it and see how hard that thing is to control. I swear it has a mind of its own." Hadyn
"No sugar, that's your front tail." Edena
"Edena! I can't believe you said that to your brother! Where did you hear that?" Seraphina
"Good grief, Matera! I am almost 30 years old. I am the last of my friends who hasn't had a lover yet. And if that's what concerns you, then you need to talk to your son about where he's been planting that shorter front tail lately." Edena
Sherrilyn Kenyon Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Sherrilyn Kenyon: You do it and see how hard that thing is to control. I swear it
Bronagh," I said, grinning at my sister.
"What is your favourite position in bed?"
Dominic looked at his lady, a smirk playing on his lips. Bronagh mulled my question over in her mind then after some serious consideration she said, "Near the wall, so I'm closest to me phone when it's chargin'."
I tittered at her answer, then looked to Dominic and burst into laughter. The look of hurt and betrayal was plastered all over his sculpted face.
"Kicking me in the nuts would have been less painful, Bronagh," he muttered as he stood up and practically dragged himself, and his wounded ego, out of the room
L.A. Casey Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By L.A. Casey: Bronagh," I said, grinning at my sister."What is your favourite position in bed?"Dominic looked at
Step one: Invade your opponet's mind. This is just like using mind-speak. Try it on me."
"That's easy," I said, casting my mental nets toward Dante, ensnaring his mind, and pushing words into his conscious thought. I'm in your mind, having a look around, and it's awfully empty in here.
Wiseacre, Dante returned.
Nobody says that anymore. Speaking of which, how old are you in Nephilim years? I'd never thought to ask.
I swore fealty during Napoleon's invasion of Italy-my homeland.
And that was in what year ... ? Help me out. I'm not a history buff.
Dante smiled. 1796.
Wow. You're old.
Becca Fitzpatrick Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Becca Fitzpatrick: Step one: Invade your opponet's mind. This is just like using mind-speak. Try it on
I know some people say I can be funny. But there is always a deeper meaning to what I say. I am a socialist at heart and have the interests of the poor in mind. When people see how I manage to work my way out of tough situations, it gives them hope in their own life.Lalu Prasad Yadav Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Lalu Prasad Yadav: I know some people say I can be funny. But there is always a deeper
I think it's really important for celebrities to use their power of money and fame to get their voices out there. It's funny to me that we're expected to keep quiet just because of who we are. Why do I lose my right to speak my mind because I'm famous?Lisa Edelstein Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Lisa Edelstein: I think it's really important for celebrities to use their power of money and fame
You can read minds, and you didn't tell me?" Link stared at me like he just found out I was the Silver Surfer. He rubbed his head nervously. "Hey, man, all that stuff about Lena? I was yankin' your chain." He looked away. "Are you doin' it now? You're doin' it, aren't you? Dude, get out of my head." He backed away from me and into the bookshelf.
"I can't read your mind, you idiot.
Kami Garcia Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Kami Garcia: You can read minds, and you didn't tell me?" Link stared at me like he
After reading some of my stories, I once had a friend say to me, "I'd love to spend five minutes in your head to see what's going on in there." I warned them, "If you spent five seconds in my mind you'd probably run out screaming and never speak to me again.Mark W. Boyer Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Mark W. Boyer: After reading some of my stories, I once had a friend say to me, "I'd
On summer evenings, when every flower, and tree, and bird, might have better addressed my soft young heart, I have in my day been caught in the palm of a female hand by the crown, have been violently scrubbed from the neck to the roots of the hair as a purification for the Temple, and have then been carried off highly charged with saponaceous electricity, to be steamed like a potato in the unventilated breath of the powerful Boanerges Boiler and his congregation, until what small mind I had, was quite steamed out of meCharles Dickens Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Charles Dickens: On summer evenings, when every flower, and tree, and bird, might have better addressed my
I decided the reason why Luccas rushed off was he was allergic to the food that they had brought out. Not paying compliments to the decorations, I poked at the squid with a fork making sure it was dead. Yuck, it reminded me of squid shaped spaghetti. My mind imagined it struggling to break free from my fork. Its legs flopped back and forth, to the sides almost as if it danced. Then to eat it while it squirmed after every bite; chomp, chomp, chomp. On the other hand, you could also eat it raw, but I suppose that was where the squirming comes in. Hmm ... Any who ... Before we get off topic, I finally ate it. Yes, even with the gross images in mind.Millicent Ashby Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Millicent Ashby: I decided the reason why Luccas rushed off was he was allergic to the food
Wait," he said, pulling me to a stop when I tried to march off toward my destiny. "Is there something you want to tell me?"
I looked at him, trying to think of anything I'd done recently that I needed to admit to. When nothing came to mind other than the usual, I shook my head. "Not really. Why?"
He reached out and touched my leather jacket. "Is that a bullet hole?"
Freaking great.
Jaye Wells Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Jaye Wells: Wait," he said, pulling me to a stop when I tried to march off toward
NO ONE GETS OUT OF CHILDHOOD ALIVE. It's not the first time I've said that. But among the few worthy bon mots I've gotten off in sixty-seven years, that and possibly one other may be the only considerations eligible for carving on my tombstone. (The other one is the one entrepreneurs have misappropriated to emboss on buttons and bumper stickers: The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
(I don't so much mind that they pirated it, but what does honk me off is that they never get it right. They render it dull and imbecile by phrasing it thus: "The two most common things in the universe are ... "
(Not things, you insensate gobbets of ambulatory giraffe dung, elements! Elements is funny, things is imprecise and semi-guttural. Things! Geezus, when will the goyim learn they don't know how to tell a joke.
Harlan Ellison Out Of My Mind Funny Sayings By Harlan Ellison: NO ONE GETS OUT OF CHILDHOOD ALIVE. It's not the first time I've said that.